Why Dating a New Boyfriend is Like Training for a Marathon

Taking on a new boyfriend is kind of like training to run a marathon, or at least what I imagine it’s like to train for a marathon. Yes, there’s *that* comparison – the obvious one involving the sheer physical exertion of both long-distance running and marathon sessions in bed. Tellingly, men always assume I’m referring to that whenever I make that comparison. But I wouldn’t really know, since I can barely run a mile, much less 26. Although this does give me a more charitable explanation for my tendency to carbo-load the night before a big date, instead of my usual explanation, which quickly degenerates into a self-loathing internal monologue along the lines of ‘Isn’t your ass huge enough as it is? Do you really need to eat like a bear about to hibernate for the winter? You are *not* a Green Bay Packer, therefore you cannot *eat* like a Green Bay Packer.’

But I digress. The comparison between dating a new boyfriend and training for a marathon rings most true for me in reference to time. Both require a major time investment every day, in addition to all of the other activities of your regular life. Although Frenchy and I live in the same huge city, we are separated by a not insignificant number of miles of jammed highways and surface streets that are often just as busy. Sometimes it feels as if I’ve committed to a regular *second* commute, in addition to the one I make for work. And on those nights we don’t spend together, we usually chat on the phone or facetime for a while.

But the time commitment isn’t the only similarity. My runner friends--who actually do run marathons--tell me they get antsy if they can’t run every day. They crave the runner’s high they get from a good daily run. Seems similar to the “dater’s high” one gets during and after a great date. Kind of the opposite of many of my dates before Frenchy came along. Those dates induced "dater's panic," an attractive combination of flop sweat and PTSD.

Finally, there’s the lure of the costume. Sure, I could train for a marathon in regular sweats and a t-shirt, just as I could go out on a date in the same old regular clothes. But it’s that desire to dress up for the occasion, of looking the part – whether it’s that of a serious long-distance runner or a sexy date who is making an effort – that is similar. Oddly, both often involve spandex. At least if you’re doing it right.